Jenny Farr was a 3rd generation RLDS member and attended the Stewartsville, Missouri congregation. She was taught, and believed, that she was a member of the “only true church” and that God had restored His original institution through Joseph Smith. In high school Jenny started dating Kevin, a Baptist boy and when their relationship became serious she asked Kevin to attend the RLDS church with her which he agreed to do. After they were married Kevin began to feel unfulfilled spiritually and went back to his Baptist roots. Jenny made an intense study of RLDS doctrine and began to have serious enough doubts about the Church that she knew she had to leave. She accepted Christ as her Lord and Savior and now serves along side her husband who pastors a church in eastern Missouri. This is her testimony.

Stewartsville, Missouri

I was raised in northwest Missouri by loving, encouraging parents who belonged to the Reorganized Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Born in 1965, and baptized at the age of eight, I was taught that I was a member of the ‘only true church’ and that God had restored His original institution through Joseph Smith, a prophet of the latter days. I was never given to questioning whether God loved me. It was a matter of fact, and I will always be grateful that my parents not only taught me that, but exemplified that abiding love to me also. I believed that I sometimes committed sinful acts that displeased God, but that I could be forgiven by being sorry enough for them to not ever do them again. If I truly meant it, I would be clean again like I was at baptism. (The trouble was that I always seemed to do something wrong again and again. What was the matter with me?) I was blessed to be the youngest of six children in a blended family; so I had many chances to learn life’s lessons by witnessing my siblings learning things the hard way. All in all I thought I was a pretty good person and I hoped when I died that God would forgive me of anything displeasing, and the heavenly scales would swing in my favor. Reputation reigned supreme. The only question I had about salvation was, “What if I died sometime between sin and repentance?” (providing I was ever really sorry enough anyway).

In high school I started dating a Baptist boy and we soon began having discussions about religion. He (Kevin) would occasionally ask me questions and I can’t think of one time I ever had a good answer for him, but it didn’t matter. I just knew I was in the right church. Surely, some R.L.D.S. priesthood member had the answers. I was absolutely scripturally illiterate. I could have rattled off the names of the books in the Book of Mormon; I could have told you stories like, “The Good Samaritan” and “Daniel in the Lion’s Den”; I could have spouted excerpts from church history, like the first vision story; and I could even have told you about Jesus dying on the cross; but I could never have simply told you about Jesus’ gift of salvation. I didn’t know about His death being a substitute for mine.

When the relationship between Kevin and I became more serious, so did the problems with our differing religious viewpoints. We visited with a couple of priesthood members as well as a couple of Baptist pastors. We were speaking a different language and I didn’t even know it. Nothing was resolved, but we were in love. The relationship came down to an ultimatum from me: “If you’ll just attend church with me I can live with that.” I was really thinking that if Kevin would come, he would see that the R.L.D.S. church was the true church. He agreed to attend so we got married. It sounds like a stupid thing to do considering the circumstances, but I will never stop thanking God for allowing it!

A few years passed: we had a couple of beautiful kids. Sometime in the midst of increasing our family, Kevin was feeling unfulfilled spiritually and was convicted by the Holy Spirit of unresolved sin which had caused his fellowship with God to suffer. He started reading the Bible, praying daily and attending his Baptist Church on Sunday nights and Wednesdays. Our R.L.D.S. Church didn’t hold services at these times. Attendance had dwindled and we weren’t even having prayer meetings for a while. I reluctantly attended with him most of the time because I didn’t have a good enough excuse not to go. I was actually refreshed when I was learning from Bible passages about people of God, historical facts and moral absolutes, taught by their pastor. He made practical sense out of what the Bible said. Kevin soon rededicated his life to Christ and began praying earnestly for me and for our relationship as husband and wife. I knew I should read my Bible too and it had always been something I would do “someday;” so I got a Revised English Version that I could understand better than the King James and I started in. I was helped by a read-the-Bible-through chart I had received from a women’s class at a non-denominational church. I had been invited to attend these classes by a Christian friend and I was so struck by their obvious relationship with Jesus and their knowledge of the scriptures.

We had our third child and that Christmas Kevin bought a New International Version Bible for me so I continued reading in it. We had also been listening to a Christian radio station regularly and were learning so much from the sermons and Bible teachers. I wondered though, how so many of those Christian Radio Teachers could have the Spirit of God, when they had never been ordained in the “true priesthood.” But it was very evident to me that they did have God’s Spirit. What was it, then, that we had as R.L.D.S. people, that they were missing? What I didn’t know was that they had something that I was missing. “The Bible Answer Man” program was on one day when Kevin heard a Mormon person call in to the show and discuss some things with Hank Hanegraaff. This sparked his interest enough to write to the Christian Research Institute to get some more information on Joseph Smith and church history. I didn’t know about this yet and I was still very staunch in my religious convictions.

In October of 1994, I was visited by my R.L.D.S. pastor and called to the priesthood, to the office of “priest.” We had still been faithfully attending the R.L.D.S. Church on Sundays and I was growing in knowledge as I read God’s Word. I wasn’t really surprised by this calling since women were now allowed into the priesthood and I was faithful in attendance, but it did present a dilemma for our family. I knew Kevin would not fully support me in this because, after seven years of marriage and attendance he still had never joined the church. Also, I would possibly be speaking at other congregations and I couldn’t see him and the kids coming with me to do that. It was an awkward situation. I read the priesthood manual and contemplated accepting the call but never acted on anything. No one from church ever asked me about it again. The pastor didn’t even follow up on it, so it was just brushed under the rug. I never told my family either because I was afraid they would push me to accept without considering some of the problems that I could foresee.

At this point, Kevin gently presented me with a small amount of literature he had received. It related some practical, documented discussion about two topics: Joseph Smith’s claims to be a prophet, including some facts about his life and prophecies, and the Biblical texts used to prove the authenticity of the Book of Mormon. Common sense made it clear that if Joseph Smith wasn’t what he claimed to be, the whole church structure and beliefs fall. It all rested on his truthfulness, and the facts I read called it into serious question. Hebrew scholars explained some key words and passages in Isaiah 29 and Ezekiel 37 that destroyed the arguments used by fellow church members that these passages referred to the Book of Mormon. I was speechless, and even angry; so I just put all this on a mental shelf.

We later received some videotapes about creation versus evolution by a man named Kent Hovind. Dr. Hovind answered many questions I had had about dinosaurs, the age of the earth, the flood, etc. in such a way as to merge the Bible and science in a completely compatible way. I was annoyed at first by his adamant claim of the complete reliability of the Bible as the Word of God, but everything he said made so much sense. Not long after we viewed these tapes I finished reading the Bible. (It was September 1995 and it was about this time that I asked Jesus to be my Savior.) It had taken me exactly three years to get through the whole thing. I was thoroughly convinced by that time that it had to all be true. What else is there to stand on? If the Bible isn’t true in its entirety, then anything goes. There has to be something in this world that is beyond the subjective reasoning of humans. There has to be something absolute and true to guide our lives by.

I had been taught that the Bible was good, but that it had been mistranslated down through the years by various scribes. The result of that thinking is an incomplete trust of what the Bible says—a more serious and dangerous philosophy than I had ever imagined. (The first thing Satan said to Eve was a question making her doubt God’s Word. Genesis 3:1) That then, leaves you with the task of deciding which parts are of God, and which parts aren’t. Your guess is as good as mine—unless a prophet has been given the original Word again. I began researching the Inspired Version as compared to the King James Bible. My Aunt had given me an invaluable tool for this – “Joseph Smith’s New Translation of the Bible” – a book showing side-by-side differences between the two versions. I believe that because I now had the Holy Spirit to guide and to teach, I was able to see some irreconcilable problems between the Inspired Version and the Word of God (I Corinthians 2:12-14).

During this time I was privileged to be the Senior High Youth Sunday School teacher. I had some of the Church’s curriculum but I was free to use material from other sources too so I chose some appropriate literature from a Christian bookstore I frequented. Among the many things I learned while I was teaching, was a lesson on Jesus being God. Well, I didn’t really disagree with that, but had never really thought about it being exactly true either. Jesus is God’s Son, but is He God? Did He ever sin? I found places in scripture that affirmed that He is God and that He is sinless (John 1:1, 10:30; II Corinthians 5:21). After coming to the firm belief that Jesus IS God incarnate, I was realizing more and more how hard it is to make Christianity and the R.L.D.S. religion compatible, even down to the story of the first vision which related Joseph Smith having seen TWO personages. God is Spirit (John 4:24 and Jesus is God in the flesh (Philippians 2:5-8, Colossians 1:15—so Joseph was either strongly deluded, or he was lying.

By November of 1995 I was having serious enough doubts about the doctrine and origins of the R.L.D.S. Church that I began more openly questioning things and even writing to various organizations to get more information on the subject. I was referred to a group called Christian Liberty Outreach in Independence, Missouri, who provided me with an abundance of literature regarding historical inaccuracies and doctrinal errors distinctive to the R.L.D.S. Church. I was overwhelmed. I felt like one feels when they’ve been lied to by a trusted friend. I couldn’t refute the documentation of the things about Joseph Smith that the Church never taught me. I read with my own eyes in black and white the hundreds of inconsistencies between historical fact, archaeology, the Bible and what Joseph Smith and the Book of Mormon claimed. I was appalled. I was scared. I was heartsick. I became thoroughly convinced that the R.L.D.S. church and its leadership were not of God as I had previously assumed. I knew I had to leave the church. I couldn’t raise my children in a church that taught false doctrines and purposely concealed parts of its own history from its membership.

I prayed for God’s guidance as I endeavored to tell my family and church friends that we would no longer be attending church with them. It came as quite a shock to them and I fully expected hurt feelings and lots of questions. The hurt feelings certainly became a reality but I was unfortunately surprised by the lack of questions I was asked. No one wanted to know why nearly as much as I wanted to tell them why. Because of my strong relationship with my family, I had every reason to believe they would at least hear me out; but I was forbidden to speak about it and the subject of religion became taboo. This added to the agony of leaving a heritage that was once so dear to me. I leaned on Jesus and my newfound faith in Him to hold me up through this stormy time. I knew He was all I needed, which leads me to tell you now about coming to know Him…

Back in the autumn of 1995, while I was nearing completion of reading the Bible through for the first time, I was dealing with that previously mentioned dilemma: What happened if I died between sinning and repenting? I couldn’t be perfect like I was supposed to be; but if I was going to heaven just because God loves me, then so was everybody that had ever lived – He loves everybody, right? I knew I had to “believe” in Jesus and I thought that salvation rested on something I had to do, be or maintain. I had grown up thinking that salvation was based on my behavior and my choices in life and that being R.L.D.S. earned merits with God. I believed in hell, but I really didn’t think there would be too many people going there (only the really bad ones) and I certainly wasn’t worried about myself being completely condemned. I was an OK person. Anyway, God is the perfect judge, so I would just have to wait until I died to know my eternal destiny, and hope for the best. I had no assurance of my salvation but, basically, my belief was that God graded on the curve. However, some people did have that solid assurance of being “saved.” How could they be so cocky?

Then, God told me through His perfect, preserved Word, by the power of the Holy Spirit, what I was seeking to know…The Bible is completely trustworthy, and it says that we are saved by God’s gracious mercy through faith in Jesus, and that it’s not of ourselves. It is the gift of God (Ephesians 2:8-9). You can’t earn a gift because it would deny the very nature of it and you couldn’t call it a gift. You just humbly receive it – it’s called having faith; faith that what Jesus did on the cross is complete, sufficient, satisfying to God, and done. I didn’t just “believe” in Jesus and give mental assent to His existence, death and resurrection; now I trusted Him. What a difference in perspective I had been shown! My faith in the fact that Jesus suffered, shed His blood and died in my place for all the sins I have ever committed, or will ever commit, is satisfying to God. Then HE is the one who does all the good works He has ordained for you to do, through you (Ephesians 2:10, Philippians 2:13). The wages of sin – any amount of sin – is death (Romans 3:23) and my debt has been paid. All my good works of service to God amount to a pile of filthy rags (Isaiah 64:6), compared to the all-sufficient atonement of Jesus on the cross. I learned that repentance doesn’t just mean “I’m really sorry,” it’s a change of mind about who I’m following, and about what direction I’m going – deciding to agree with God about Himself and about my sin.

Realizing that I had a sinful nature because I am a fallen human in a fallen world, was a huge factor in acknowledging my need of the Savior. I was convicted of my sin and humbled to repentance. I wasn’t born a child of God; I was born spiritually dead, separated from God. That’s why I had to be born again – to be alive spiritually by faith in Jesus (John 3:6-7; Romans 5:18-19). It was evident to me that this is so true when I thought of the selfish nature of a little child and how they have to be taught to be good, not taught to be bad. The Bible says we are condemned already and there’s only one way to salvation (John 3:18,36).

How can I say that my works don’t count? What about all the commands in the Bible about being righteous and serving the Lord? They do count and I am called to be righteous; but it all came together in my mind when God showed me that He changed my motives for good works when He changed my heart. Now I know that anything I do for God out of gratitude and love – because of what’s already been done and finished for me – is what will last. Being “good” in order to be saved or to stay saved will burn up – it can’t be done. When I realized that, I could cease my striving to appease God, and I was free. The truth really does set you free! I am saved and I know it because I know Jesus (II Timothy 1:12, I John 5:13; Jude 24). That’s not cocky, that’s the truth. My previous belief that I would be saved because of myself IS cocky – it’s called pride and God hates it (Proverbs 6:16-19, 8:13). I will wrestle with sin until the day I die and go to be with Jesus (Romans 7:17-25); but God says that when I trusted Jesus as my Savior, He clothed me with Jesus’ righteousness and that’s what He sees when I come before Him. (Colossians 1:22, 2:13-14). I am whiter than snow even though I am imperfect on this earth. That’s the Good News! All I did was trust Jesus! It isn’t because I was good enough; it isn’t because I had been baptized by the proper authority; it isn’t because I believed in extra-biblical revelation or someone claiming to be a prophet; it isn’t because I was a member of an organization that is pursuing peace and has a temple; it isn’t because I was so sorry for my sin that I promised to never do it again; It’s faith in Jesus – period.

You can have salvation right here and right now, no matter who you are or what you’ve ever done, Jesus paid for it. God does love you, and that’s all you need. Tell God right now that you admit your sinful condition before his perfect holiness and accept His wonderful gift of love and forgiveness in His Son Jesus. Relinquish Lordship from yourself to Him. You can be sure He will complete the work that He will begin in you the moment you ask (Ephesians 1:13-14, Philippians 1:6).

Kevin and I have a better marriage than ever, now that we are brother and sister in Christ, and we are active members of a historical Christian denomination that does not claim to be the only church that God is pleased with (see R.L.D.S. Doc. and Cov. 1:5e). Our church family studies God’s Holy Word, prays, worships the Lord, loves each other and is on a mission to spread the hope Jesus gives. I hope that you will trust Jesus as your Savior and consider finding a place of worship that promotes the Bible as God’s complete written revelation to us and praises Jesus as the only sufficient and complete atonement for reconciliation with God.

“How firm a foundation, ye saints of the Lord,
Is laid for your faith in His excellent Word!
What more can He say than to you He has said
To you who for refuge to Jesus have fled?”